Live, Love, Laugh, Learn, and Leave a Legacy

As I approach this weekend in anticipation of a great time of river rafting, camping and fishing with a group of men of integrity, conviction and courage, I am reflective upon the destruction that a drivenness to succeed can cause an individual and his/her family.

I intend on returning to the twelve step series on Monday, but for today I wanted to comment, once again, on the idea of success. How we measure success ( because we all want to succeed ) will determine how we live our life.

I attribute my reflective state today to a coffee I shared this morning with a good friend who is a struggling former police officer. By the measurement of the profession ( such as investigative ability, reputation, and results) he was highly successful. A series of events have taken place that have left him alienated by many of his former colleagues, and brought him to a place of deep introspection himself.

I watched him as he held his wife in his arm, the love and commitment very clear in his look and actions, after enduring much hardship and heartache together, and I thought " wow, no matter what he has done in his career, this is true success."

We are bombarded with the illusion that success is something that can be bought, acquired or achieved. We strive to impress and strive to achieve only to realize that the always moving standard of outward success will never, ever, bring peace and wholeness to our hearts and souls.

A gentle and peaceful soul, a hearty laugh, kibittzing with little kids, living an authentic and real life, in all its ups and downs, is to have succeeded. Having the respect of persons of character and integrity is to have succeeded. Living with courage is to have succeeded.

I know my friend has and will continue to succeed in the important areas of life. He is a man of courage and compassion who, unfortunately, has hit a rough patch in life and has been let down by the institution that he has poured his heart and soul into.

From tragedy can come triumph. An awakening to the important things in life can sometimes be very painful but is always a blessing in disguise.

For the cops out there who are struggling, I encourage you to really read the words of Ralph Waldo Emerson. Re-align your priorities and convictions and enjoy a successful and rich life of love, laughter, simplicity, courage and honor. This is the only lasting legacy that is worth anything at all. It is worth your all.